It's a JOURNAL
by iNikkix3
Summary: Welcome to Fran's-Froggy's-FRAN'S GTFO BEL-SENPAI  Cute Diary - MANLY JOURNAL FULL. STOP. NOT. A. GAY. SWIRLY. THING. Fran's not always the emotionless frog you think he is. Welcome to his life. Rated T for really bad language and heavily implied yaoi.


**Disclaimer: iNikkix3 does not own KHR (:**

**Apologies: I'm really slacking off on Dear 26-sama right now, but I have exams! (Not that I didn't have the whole year and that I managed to take time off to write this…) Er… I'll try to work on it after next week, guys. I'll try. No promises. The plot bunnies have been eaten by the EVULZ wolves.**

* * *

><p><strong>Fran's- <strong>**Froggy's-**** Fran's (GTFO, senpai) ****Cute Diary~**** Manly Journal FULL. STOP. NOT. A. SWIRLY. THING.**

* * *

><p><span>Today (I'm so effing cool I don't write dates ASDFGHJKL;YEAH)<span>

(I'm not even going to write a girly 'dear diary' because only that ugly what's-his-name does it. Both ugly what's-his-name's. And I'm a masculine man.)

Lussuria got a gay book each for everyone, for us to express our inner feelings. Bet he's looking for secret porn fantisiez fantizies** fantasies** when he sneaks around later.

God, no.

_Fran_

(I sure hope he doesn't have a copy of the key for this JOURNAL.)

Later

(This is a JOURNAL. Not a diary, for all you wimps.)

Dinner was crap. When will Gay Lord get that I'm allergic to pineapples?

Angry- I mean, emotionless face. I suppose I'd better move on to talking about my troo **true** feelings…

My Inner Feelings On The Pineapple Gang:

Rokudo Mukuro (ringleader): KUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFU.

Me: -bashbashbash-

Result: One PEDOZ TERRIBLEZ IDIOTICZ master.

Chrome: -sweet voice- Mukuro-sama!

Me: He deserves it.

Chrome: Not Mukuro-sama!

Result: Brainwashed through and through.

Ken: -drools like the horny dog he is-

Me: Look. Bubble Gum on Mars. That's why the planet's red. Plus, it's Chrome's favourite raspberry flavor…

Ken: LET ME GO BRING THE PLANET DOWN THEN.

Result: Gahllibble** Gullible** and horny. Urgh.

Chikusa: -shoves glasses up so that it catches the light and glints like an EVIL boss-

Result: Acting cool, Kaki-pi. But he's a walking dictionary.

Now that's out of the way… I'm going to sleep. And locking this journal up in a secret hiding place. Not that I'm writing anything much. But one word sums things up: _Bel-senpai._

_Fran_

Think it's sometime in the morning (BOO)

ASDFGHJKL;WAFFLES.

IT'S TOO EARLY.

I'M GOING TO GET SOME EAR PLUGS.

_Fran_

GTFO LEVI (sometime after I got ear plugs)

ASDGFSRGAIEGPERNGPDFVNAEFGP.

NO, I DON'T HAVE EXTRA TOILET PAPER OR A SPARE TOILET BOWL TO FLUSH YOUR HEAD IN. NOW STOP CRYING AND KILLING ALL THE POOR TREES IN THIS WORLD.

_Fran_

At a reasonable time (… around noon?)

The idiotic long-haired commander woke me up. Fucking moaning. With that stupid boss of mine. Last night.

Dheesgahsting... **Gross**.

Non-stop throughout the whole night. ROAR.

Then when I finally got, I don't know, _five seconds _of sleep, the gay dipshit comes sniffling in to look for more tissue paper. Maybe he thought this was the Gay Lord's room or something.

Ooh, scandehlohs scandahlus **SCANDALOUS**.

(Fran's Conscience: Maybe he just wanted more toilet paper to wipe that snot off his ugly mug while he's crying…

Fran: GTFO, WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?)

I should stick a sign on the door that tells all idiots whose room this is. If they can't remember after years of me being here, it's time to bring out Captain Obvious.

Unless… they don't bother to notice me? O_O

… moving on…

On the bright side, I managed to express my true heartfelt feelings in this journal. Well done! Give yourself a pat on the back, Fran!

_Fran_

Five minutes later

I SWEAR, I WILL TAKE HIS HEAD AND GO-

I mean, T.T face.

Bel-senpai should be thrown out of earth. Preferably into space, since I'll go to hell anyway I don't want to meet him.

Sorry, you're probably confused? It went like:

"Ushishishi." The fake prince said (come on, you can't call that gay sqeek squeak a laugh).

Being the truthful man I am, I say, "That gay squeak is not even a laugh."

Of course, being the rude little boy he is, he replied with, "Bad froggy! I'll laugh however I want!"

Followed with three knives.

Because three is a magical number.

Ha. Ha. Ha. Not funny.

As I am so honest, I have to say my true feelings, "Bel-senpai, getting weaker lately? That barely hurt."

Bad move. It trigered** triggered** his sadistic streak.

Stab. Stab. Stab.

Which would be painful. Except I can't, you know, feel any pain.

Oh! Boo hoo! Pet the little frog's head because he has no pain or pleasure nerves!

… Stupid shishou. ("Kufufu! Give my disciple no pain nerves because then he'll be incivinble** invincible**! But of course, not as good as his Royal Big Headed Pineapple here!")

Stab. Stab. Stab.

Fuck, now I have to fix my uniform again.

Afterwards, I decided not to have breakfast. Or lunch. BRUNCH.

Tee hee. I'm a ginius- **genius**.

Turning around, I sontered sauntered back into my room and slammed the door.

IN YOUR FACE. Or as I should say, IN HIS FUGLY FACE. (Note the erleeterashion alitterayshion… poetic device… used.)

_Fran_

(The satisfaction of one-upping Bel-senpai died down. I'm hungry.)

In the middle of lunch and dinner (lunner?)

I love strawberries. The Gay Lord, when he tries to feed me those strawberries, though, not so much.

ASDFGHJKL;MYEYES.

_Fran_

Later

The Vongola Tenth called to ask Boss out. The old prematurely-white-haired commander is, to put it croodely **crudely**, pissed. (Now, now, stomping around and pulling out Levi's flowers isn't a sign of maturity… Wait, what maturity?)

So is the gay wrinkly-faced overly-pierced boss-obsessed guy, but I don't like him after- but I don't like him. Hence, I shall not mention that he is having comfort sex with the Gay Lord.

… Did I just say…

OOH, SHAMEFUL.

Not as much as the gay- well, not that everyone except for Gola Mosca (IT'S ASEXUAL, I SWEAR) and me aren't, but still- commander is when he's moapping **moping** around the base and giving the Varia a bad name.

I'm still counting the number of dead grunts. (390 peo- 391 p- 392 PEOPL- Ah, fuck it.)

Though it is nice and quiet now.

_Fran_

Even later 

It turns out that Boss was sent on some mission. Damn. What happened to the sorded **sordid** affairs that were supposed to happen?

I am greatly dissapointed **disappointed**.

_Fran_

(Damn, I need to get a spell-check tool to help me or something.)

(Or type all this shit before copying it down… WHY AREN'T DIA- JOURNALS TECHNOLOGY-SAVVY?)

Dinner time

I didn't know why I just wrote that. Gay Lord is too busy shagging wrinkly-face to cook anything. But it'd look weird with just 'Time' there, so I had to put something in. Right? RIGHT.

ARGH NERD DISEASE.

(804 p- 806 peop- 807 peo- I don't even know why I'm still trying.)

Grr, I'm hungry. I need waffles.

_Fran_

Later 

Bel-senpai came into my room. (WTFLOLBBQ WHAT AN UNDERSTATEMENT)

Like, OMGSRSLY?

Yes, OMGSRSLY.

ARGH SHORTENED-WORDS DISEASE. (Lyk, OMG, tt top is TLY KAWAII desu. XOXO, Wapanese grlz.)

How do you pronounce that anyway? "LICK, OHM-GGH, TE TOHP EES T-LEE KAHWAH-EE DAH-SU. ZOX-OH, WAP-PEN-NEESE GRR-LZ?"

… Sounds like Levi at night.

I shall detail everything out carefoolly- **carefully**:

I was lying on my bed in a fetal position, too hungry to do anything but moan and groan. (NOT IN THAT SICK WAY.)

Come to think of it, it was rather annoying the way there were so many irregular thuds on my door. And irritating. Much like Bel-senpai.

Bang. Ah. Sooperbely- **Superbly** loud sound.

In one tiny second, I was laedin laden with knives. Could have been dust, for all I felt. But it was the thought that counted. MEANZ SENPAI.

"Ushishishi~ The Prince brought food, uncute kouhai!~" The golden-topped dango (a new flavor…?) stood in the door way, beside the porcupine like door (I WILL HAVE TO PAY TO FIX THAT. EVULZ!).

Speak of the devil and here he comes- FOOD.

"Mm…" I almost drooled. Almost.

But the Fran with poise does not do that normally. So the hungry Fran could not either. Hmph.

"Come to me, beautiful dango…" I muttered under my breath.

Hopefully, Bel-senpai did not hear that.

"The Gay Lord dared the Prince to cook something, so the Prince did!" The lovely, delicious dango announced. "It's a meal worthy of the Prince, since the Prince cooked it. Ushishishi."

Then the platter of food was shoved in my face. It smelt terrible. And when I looked up with big watery pleading eyes for better food, the giant dango was eating Pocky. ASDFGHJKL;POCKY.

My fingers twitched like a half-dead thing. Though that was enough to summon the delicious box over.

… You seriously do not want to know what I did to that box. Smiley face... I mean, deadpan face. Like this: Q_Q

Bel-senpai froze for a moment, his face like this: o_e

He really needs to get that unhealthy eye twitch checked by a doctor that can stand knives. Like me.

Ugh, I was not volunterring **volunteering**, thank you very much.

Then…

"Froggy! My… MY POCKY!" Bel-senpai screamed like a maniac, throwing a tentrom** tantrum**. Really, kicking and rolling around and wailing and-

ENOUGH.

Bel-senpai was kicked out. With all his knives bent. And that deesgahsting... **gross** burnt crap shoved down his throat.

Hee hee.

_Fran_

Later than Later

I suppose I haven't been doing much sharing lately. So…

My Inner Feelings On The Gay Dipshits In The Varia, Except For Me Since I'm No Dipshit, Damn This Is A Long Title:

Boss- needs to stop getting drunk and stop fucking the long-haired commander so loudly (though that's imppusible** impossible** with his current fuck buddy. Maybe a soundproof room?)

Stupid Commander- needs to STFU, thank you. (and stop stealing my strawberries for kinky acts, damn it! Or Bel-senpai's ICKY chocolate sushi concoction (ZOMG I SPEALLT TAT RITE), because then he comes after me!)

Gola Mosca- man, one creepy machine with bad breath. Use Listerine?

Wrinkly-pierced-face dude- needs to stop with the hoping and the comfort sex. And the wondering wandering into innocent innocent illusionists' (HAH POETRY DEVICE THING) rooms in the MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.

Gay Lord- needs to keep his pedophilic hands to himself (NOT LIKE THAT, SIIIICK!) but his cooking is nice enough… compared to Bel-senpai's… SHIT FROM LEVI, THAT IS.

Bel-senpai- IGOSTICAHL **EGOISTICAL** MAD MAN WHO THINKS HE STILL CAN GET SWALLOWED POCKY IF HE THROWS A TANTRUM.

Which he didn't get back. Tee hee.

_Fran_

Later than Later then Later

… I found out that online journals are called blogs. But there's no privacy! EVERYONE (cough, Bel-senpai, cough) can read it!

Ah, fuck it.

I'm sticking to dear old Journal over here. Even though I'm pepehtuly **perpetually** murdering it with all the badly spelt words.

_Fran_

Before I sleep (a very nice time of 12am, thank you. Good boys sleep early.)

I heard Bel-senpai giggling to himself when I went to the kitchen just now for my late-night milk and cookies. It was kind of creepy.

Then again, when was the stupid fake prince not creepy?

Hee hee.

I'm diebohleekal diabolikal **diabolical.**

I do hope he's not planning anything.

… But if he is, I'll counter him anyway. Because the pineapple-trained illusionist shall trumf trumph** triumph** over any stupid Storm-ists (LOOK POETIC DEVICE I SHALL ADMIT I CAN'T SPELL.)

_Fran_

… 12.02am

WHY? WHY DID THAT BA- I MEAN, WONDERFUL BOSS COME BACK? RRGH.

Straight back to carnel- **carnal** activities, huh.

OOH NASTY.

_Fran_

(I'm glad I still have spare ear plugs since I threw my favourite pair at the wrinkly-face and now I don't want to touch them. YUCKXSZ COOTIESXZ.)

… 12.04am

I forgot that my spare earplugs had weird doodles of frogs on them, certesy** courtesy** of Bel-senpai.

Better that than nothing though.

(Boss: ngh.

Long-haired stupid commander: #$%^&%$#$%^%$#$%^%$#$%^&*&^%$# -censored-)

STFU YOU ASSHOLES.

_Fran_

THE TIME NORMAL PEOPLE SLEEP

ASRGIAEHRGPERGI;GTFO-YOU-WRINKLY-FACED-PIECE-OF-FUCKING-SHIT.

I REALLY NEED TO FIX THAT DOOR. AND GET A MILLION GAZILLION LOCKS.

_Fran_

(THAT DIPSHIT IS IN DEEP SHIT. HE STOLE MY TOILET PAPER.)

TWO HOURS LATER

ASDFGHJKL;sleep.

I need sleep.

I NEED SLEEP.

BUT I CAN'T GET MY EAR PLUGS BECAUSE I THREW MY LAST PAIR AT LEVI.

ASDFGHJKL;bosshasstamina.

_Fran_

Morning… Noon… Lunner Time.

Just a little scribble before I head off on my Mission. THE FROG ILLUSIONIST IS GETTING HIS REVENGE. (WTFLOLBBQ, Bel-senpai is rubbing off on me… NOT THAT WAY, YOU SICK ASSES.)

I'm still hungry.

_Fran_

(Just. You. Wait. YOU. GAY. FAG.)

(Hee hee. Gay fag.)

(The Mission Impossible theme song is really catchy LOLZ.)

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Sorry for the weird formatting for those who read this early? FF doesn't allow words to be crossed out, so I had to reformat all of Fran's crossed out words. ASDFGHJKL;badspelling. Nevertheless, it's mostly alright now.**


End file.
